Freitag, 7. September 2012

MAGLEV or: The new world of corporate yogic merchants

(jka) If you know to expand this acronym/abbreviation exactly as in encyclopedia entry/Wikipedia entry, I congratulate you for being a part of elite few who are not in sync with actual pressing issues in India, by following paid advertisements from various satellite channels.

If you question me what is it or if you think it’s a new form of maggi, then trust me you are going to be recruited into their fold by the third set of people whom am going to talk about.

If you answer me it is MAGESH LEVITATION and question me back regarding in which branch of Yoga Lab did you learn this and about the availability of Diamond class restrooms there, then welcome to the whole new world of corporate yogic merchants and their adventurous journey towards supposed consciousness, of course fuelled by substances "which should not be named" .

You may be dumbfounded, when you see a baba (no pun intended towards Rajni Kanth, Sai Baba or XXX baba and don’t expect me to add "no pun intended" for XXX too. It is just a blank space meant to be filled by aspiring babas) claim he can cure any known disease with a Paani Poori. The moments of so called "dumbfoundedness" is bound to increase, when your frequency of switching on the Television early in the morning increases. It can be termed, "The rule of Enlightenment of course followed by a foamy brain wash ".

A country which was portrayed as "Land of Fakirs and Snakes" got transformed into "Land of Engineers and Cosmetic surgeons a.k.a Desi Silicon Valley", in a span of a century is about to become "Land of Babas and Smoking Dens". Of course both the accounts of West are highly overrated as we always had a large proportion of sane population which wasn’t fitting the portrayal and was following Dharma of the land. But now comes the test of character for every fellow being in this land, in form of a sweeping revolution of Babas and Brothers who desperately want this land to become in that way.

In this Baba Yuga, people have forgotten Kali Yuga, Dwapara Yuga and just remember the periods of various babas and Anandhas who are following the boom and bust cycles which are seen in economic theories. These entrepreneurial gurus are ruling the roost by leveraging a single factor which is "Dementia or Memory Loss", found in Indian population due to information overload which they receive every 5 years and every passing bye-election. With the excessive political literacy among people whose brains are laden with key information like conversion rates per vote (One vote to INR), which sub sect of caste does the candidates belong to, number of wives the winning candidates have, the Aam Aadmi and our cyber geeks are finding it hard to remember the Babas who had bust their beliefs time on time.

The modus operandi of these marketing gurus is extremely simple and user friendly. It can be customized to every ones needs but with the collective intelligence of the population being abysmally low the need never arises. It just needs a hut in the middle of nowhere and set of TV artists who are obviously out of business to talk about the change that Baba brought in their life. Add to this, the morning slot in prime satellite channels and of course hi-definition videos in which Baba lecture upon world topics like peace, terrorism, Anti-corruption and even Global Warming.

With that comes loads of money which would make the yoga hut transformed into sprawling campus with fountains of money oozing out from every inch of built area. It eventually becomes a tax haven and country clubs of sorts, therein our fellow money launderers need not scout for banks in tiny islands and mountainous republics. Emboldened by the money power, Gurus seek to play politics forgetting the fact that they are allowed to make money by our Chankyas, only out of convenience that they offer in legitimizing their claims to ascendancy in power politics. At the end, Chanakyas win over Gurus and both lived happily ever after, with Chanakyas in Secretariat and Gurus playing hide and seek with every enforcement agencies that is on earth, of course with their band of marauding followers.

With the end of the story, the only loser who stands out is our people who are losing their reverence to religiousness which was imbibed in us through many centuries, in search of instant awakening offered by cool dudes of this century.

Our aspirations force us to disown organic growth of character which would ultimately lead us to elevated sense of living. So we become a fertile ground for these weed planters to sow their false sense of well being within us akin to making us smoke marijuana.

With the greed comes the hefty price, when the revered guru who preached renouncing worldly pleasures gets caught amidst satiating his carnal pleasures and we are caught in withdrawal symptoms which include becoming a self professed Non-believer. Their main aim remains ridiculing people with faith and be content with their half-baked ideas stolen directly from lassie-faire philosopher. Their preaching involves questioning everything that happens in the world except the "wise words of their leader ". The concept of rationalism never works with them because they are actually a bundle of irony and paradox. That’s the sad end which the havocked follower takes by following pseudo-atheism which bases its arguments only based on denial.

When whole world is gearing towards ultra fast transport in MAGLEV ( Magnetic levitation) trains, we are descending into a bottomless hell hole with our own versions of Levitations of course a MAGLEV inspired MAGESH LEVITATION.

Bharat Ma Ta Ki !!
Bharat Ma Ta Ki !!
Jai Bolo ! Jai Bolo !
Mata Ki Jai !!!